
Finding Freedom: A Cancer Survivor's Transformation into a Life Coach and Artist
Ng Hooi See’s Instagram page @quirkybirdiepainter is filled with an adorable array of watercolour bird cartoons and poignant motivational quotes. At the top of the feed is a piece she’s most proud of: a painting of 180 birds she was commissioned to create for community space, Casual Poet Library.
“I sat with the painting for a month not knowing what I was going to do. I didn’t want to make a mistake,” the 46-year-old recalls. “I finally decided to just start and told myself that however it turns out, it will be perfect and exactly the way it’s supposed to be.”
Hooi See’s instincts were right—it did turn out perfectly. But she’s quick to admit that this more free-spirited approach is something relatively new to her. It is a mindset she’s gradually cultivated in the years since her battle with cancer.
The Struggle of Not Knowing
Hooi See’s journey began in 2018 when a health check revealed that her haemoglobin (a protein found in red blood cells) count was only half that of a normal person.
“That was why I was tired and light-headed. I thought it was because I was tired. After all, I’m a mum of three—it comes with the job,” she quips.
Seven months of uncertainty followed, during which time Hooi See had blood transfusions, took countless iron pills, and went through different colonoscopies and scans before the 6cm tumour was finally detected in her small intestines.
Then, she had to grapple with treatment decisions: After removing the tumour and a foot of her small intestines, would she do chemotherapy? And was it necessary?
“I saw three oncologists, and everybody came with a different opinion,” she shares, adding that to help her decide, her doctor even posed the question to experts at a medical conference.
“Everyone said ‘Oh you don’t really have to do it because the tumour is already out’, but when he asked what they would do if it were their wife, everyone changed their answer,” she recalls with a grimace. She eventually chose to undergo four rounds of chemo, because “if the cancer comes back back, and at least I’ll know I did my best [to stop it].”
“I kept telling myself I need this to be over”
Besides the uncertainties she faced, Hooi See also struggled to accept she was a cancer patient. After all, there were so many things to do: she had her children to care for, a career to excel at, and was even training towards getting her first pull-up—she didn’t have time to feel weak.
“I kept telling myself I need this to be over so I can go back to my life, my normal life,” she says.
Her counsellor from Singapore Cancer Society (SCS) helped her come to terms with this “new normal”.
Hooi See recalls being reluctant to attend the first session. “If it didn’t work out, I was going to leave after 10 minutes and make an excuse,” she admits. “I said I had nothing to share, but eventually as I was talking, I found myself crying.”
Through SCS, Hooi See began art therapy and was paired with a Patient Ambassador to support her through her recovery.
“The thing about having a cancer patient mentor is that when they say ‘I understand’ or ‘it’s okay’, you trust them a little more than your friends and family because they have been through the same thing,” she states.
No More Self-guilt, Only Self-love
Looking back, Hooi See acknowledges that although life has taken a different turn from what she expected, there are some changes she is grateful for.
For one thing, the experience has given her the confidence to become a Patient Ambassador herself, so she can support others walking the same tough road she did.
“I always tell [my mentees] I am not here to be their friend, because as their friend they will worry about how I feel if they text me in the middle of the night. I’m not their friend, I am here to be their support,” she says.
She’s also stopped “burning at both ends” and started prioritising self-care. Pre-cancer, she talked herself out of opportunities such as to pursue a master’s degree and to take on a culinary course—all in the name of putting others first.
Today, she’s left her high stress job and is seizing the opportunity to chase her passions. In addition to starting @quirkybirdiepainter, she’s also taken on a plant-based eating course and certified as a life coach.
“I’ve learned it’s so important to take care of yourself first. If your cup is full, you come from a place of abundance and can give freely.”