“My cancer was a wakeup call”: Breast Cancer Survivor’s Journey to a New Normal

When the results of  s mammogram came back in 2022 and she was referred for a biopsy, she prepared herself for the worst.

“I accepted it,” the 49-year-old shares of her Stage 3 breast cancer diagnosis. “I knew it was a wake-up call, and my body was telling me I had to change.”

“I felt I was not good at anything”

Meow Eng was 46 years old and working as a logistics manager when she was first diagnosed. As the pandemic raged on and working from home became the new normal, the line between work and home began to blur.

“I reached a point where I would suddenly wake up in the middle of the night and remember I have so much work piling up. I’d get up and clear my workload,” the mother-of-three recounts.

“I had too many chores to handle, too many things to take care of. I felt I was not good at anything, and I was doing badly at everything.”

In 2021, Meow Eng finally quit her job. A year later, just as she was thinking about returning to work, she discovered that she had cancer.

A Physical and Emotional Struggle

Over the next year and a half, Meow Eng underwent eight cycles of chemotherapy and immunotherapy, a mastectomy, radiotherapy, and another eight cycles of chemotherapy and nine cycles of immunotherapy to keep the cancer at bay.

Some side effects, like losing her hair, were “no big deal”. “The way people looked at me didn’t matter because I can wear a wig or a hat,” she says simply.

What did bother her was the loss of her appetite and sense of taste. The treatment affected her salivary glands and she suffered from a dry mouth.

“It was hard to bear because I couldn’t even eat biscuits or bread. I had to take it with water or soup to swallow it,” she recalls. Eating, which she once enjoyed, became a chore that she had to resign herself to in order to survive.

Feeling fatigued and weak also brought her down. “I felt I could no longer be myself, and I wondered if I would live like that forever.”

Blessed Despite her Circumstances

Despite her circumstances, Meow Eng considers herself lucky. She had a supportive medical team to encourage her. Her friends and family also rallied to help wherever they could.

As her mood continuously plummeted, she found support from Singapore Cancer Society (SCS) counsellors. She credits her counsellor for offering a much needed listening ear, helping her reframe her perspective, and teaching her skills to regulate her emotions better.

Through SCS’s physiotherapy sessions and L.I.G.H.T Groupwork, a support group for those living with advanced cancer, Meow Eng has also been able to connect with other cancer survivors. Socialising with others in a similar situation gave her a sense of community and made her feel understood and reassured.

Hopes for the Future

Today Meow Eng’s post-cancer lifestyle is starkly different from before: She no longer works crazy hours and is instead easing herself back into the workforce with a part-time job that allows her to work just a few days a week.

She is more conscious about eating healthy, has started new hobbies such as calligraphy, zumba, and doing yoga—in fact, she finds time for a bit of exercise each day.

“Doing this has helped me not just physically, but mentally as well. I feel more peace,” she explains.

Looking back, Meow Eng is adamant that her journey, however trying, was not fully a “bad thing”. “I learned to love myself,” she declares. “I think as mothers we tend to forget ourselves and put ourselves as last priority. But that’s not right. We are also important!”